Full Circle
by DevDev
Summary: The Man in Black takes Claire because he has to. He saves her, but maybe he shouldn't have.


He watches Claire for a long time before he takes her. He knows she doesn't really want her baby, is _scared_ of him really, but she is a good mother. Claire shows him what a real mother is and it gives him peace watching such a thing. And so it is with necessity only that he separates the two. Her brain is bleeding and he knows she won't survive through the night without his intervention. It's cruel really, taking a mother from her child – cruel for the both of them. He wouldn't have done it otherwise. This was the only way. As mean as it was, he saved her.

Maybe he shouldn't have.

///

First Claire can't feel anything. He misses her awareness, her smiles, her laughs. He knows these things happened before, so he tries love. Asks her questions about her baby, about her mum, but these things only make her sad and she is no use to him sad. He feeds her anger next. It's the only thing left… so what if it's fueled by lie upon lie. With a resolve in mind, at least she's got some life in her.

Claire is beautiful when her eyes glitter with hate.

///

He slowly falls in love with her (he never knew it was capable while he was like… this), so the next thing he teaches her is survival.

They take her from him one evening and he can hear her screams from his spot outside – the closest he can get to the temple. He rages by billowing back and forth – his own version of pacing, his form blacker than ash. When she hobbles out, a hole in her shoulder, her eyes reddened by tears, and voice hoarse, he encircles her and heals her for a second time. Saves her again.

But it's too late for the rest of her. Claire is insane now, her dingy hair only a curtain leading to her stony blue eyes. Insane with rage at being left alone, rage for the people who have her son, driven to the brink by the blazing bullet that ripped into her shoulder, by everything else those people did. But he _loves_ her and it's been so long since he's felt that way toward anyone or anything… so he still keeps her.

Jacob probably laughs.

He knows he can't really love her like this… not in this body, not in the next. She'll never see him more than a father even though it's the farthest from what he is. This is unfair and he longs for his old body with renewed passion, fuming at the one who robbed it away.

///

When _they_ come back, Claire slowly begins to direct her anger towards him. After all, she learns the truth – even if the truth comes in small pieces (her friends never were too great on explanations).

He's taken her child, killed her friends. He is the enemy and he cannot be trusted. Her brother makes her smile, Hugo makes her laugh, hell… Sayid makes her lust before he's blown to bits. The man in black loves seeing her like her old self, it's the reason he saved her after all, but God, it stings when Claire looks at him like that. When she waits for him by the submarine, it gives him a surge of hope. This means she loves him too, right?

But he knows their moments on the dock will be their last happy ones. Once Claire finds out what he's done, there will be no redemption for him. So he leaves before she finally turns, hatred oozing towards him forever. He's got a mission, anyway.

///

The last time he sees her, it hurts. She wants to leave, and he can't let that happen – Aaron be damned. Jack, Hugo, Desmond, Sawyer are gathered at the tree line and she trails, rifle tucked under her arm just like he taught her. "I loved you," he says, Locke's arm encircling her neck (he owes her a human death). He snaps it before she can scream or inhale a breath. Cleanly and thankfully quick, her eyes go blank and her body goes limp. Jack runs from the trees, a shout of "no!" on his angry lips. He doesn't move, but lays Claire's body in the warm sand and closes her eyes gently. He doesn't allow himself to feel Jack's shove or punches or Sawyer's bullet. He feels sadness, remorse. "I couldn't let her go," he says before they let him sulk away.

He watches as they bury her, the men taking their time despite having an important mission – the mission to end his own existence. Then they say a few words and leave her behind for the final time.

He sheds a tear, but wipes it away in haste.

Now he understands Mother, but he doesn't like it; doesn't like it at all.

end.


End file.
